Hell General

Intention

From the beginning, people have questioned why I would want an Ice Cream Truck or further more, what would I do with an Ice Cream Truck?

When people would ask this of me, I'd just stare blankly back at them, almost as if I had fallen asleep with my eyes open. You see, for one, being apart of the Ice Cream Truck community, we have skills that others do not and staring is actually a form of communication for our kind; as are verbal obscenities and stalking. Secondly, and more to the point, I hate children.

In all fairness though, this isn't just about tormenting whining brats with slip and slides. This is about America. That's right, A-MERRY FUCKING CA! And I wouldn't feel like a true American, if I didn't let others know about the tragic horrors I endured from the Ice Cream Man.

So when you think you're just about ready to pick up that phone and call in a "disturbing the peace" report to your local authorities, remember one thing, the terrorist are the ones that hate our freedom.

Do you?